Don't worry, you are not the only one who has anxiety problems and are shy around people. And to be able to overcome it takes time, so don't be disappointed if you can't get it right the first few times or whatsoever.

 Although it seems easy to get over it by telling yourself that as long as you talk to more people and don't worry about being embarrassed and you would slowly get used to it, it's usually not that simple. Yes, it would be easier as you get used to it, but making the first move is scary.

  When I was young I was like you. I usually make friends by accident, not deliberately. And I used to be so scared to really talk that once or a few times my mom caught me repeating to myself over and over again, "Sorry...sorry...sorry.." I think I had been thinking about saying sorry to my mother and I was trying to practice saying it out loud or something.
 Anyway, somehow things got better and suddenly I wasn't so self-conscious anymore and now I'm kind of the class-clown sort of thing?

 Okay, back to you. No friends in class. That is probably not because no one accepts you, but because you don't dare to talk to people. When people talk to you, you might suddenly feel as if your breath caught, your throat and lips became dry and you simply can't talk properly.

 Maybe you are afraid of eye-contact. When you talk to new people, you might feel uncomfortable looking into their eyes and faces or something. So next time when someone talks to you, try to look somewhere else, maybe the clock behind them or something. If you are even afraid to really hold your chin up(I used to be) you can stare at the text books you are holding or at the table or at your fingers.

 But try not to look too awkward doing that. Maybe while you try to converse, occasionally look up and give the person you are talking to a shy smile to tell them that you are not being rude, and nod and try to do something with your hands if you feel uncomfortable. Put them in your pocket, bob your head, rock your heels back and forth.

 Do you feel more comfortable if you talk to people who are younger than you? From a year younger to toddlers and babies? Because if that is so, just imagine that the person you are talking to is younger than you and views you as someone who is more...experienced and then you would feel more comfortable, like, "Hey, she's looking up to me."

 As for getting embarrassed. I used to be so afraid of people looking at me that when the teacher called out our names and we have to raise our hands and say "Present", I was bathed in nervous, cold sweat by the time the teacher called me and all I could manage is to raise my hand up a little and quickly put it by my side so no one would notice me.
 Well, you might want to tell yourself, so what if they laugh at me? Would I die? No. If you are afraid of people laughing at you, know that they'd only laugh harder if you turn red and get embarrassed. So in order not to make them laugh, make a sarcastic, "Ha-ha." and try to change the topic/subject.

 You know all this takes time. So take things little by little. Start with trying to be more comfortable with your close friends. You must know that people won't judge you because everyone has their little fears. Try to tell yourself that you are GREAT at speaking, it's just all about hidden potential and someday people are going to realize how cool and funny you are and stuff.

Good luck and if you need more help or just someone to talk to feel free to message me. =)

Posted at 3:51 am on Nov. 19, 2008