I've noticed that my eating habits have changed drastically over the past year. When I was in ninth grade I made this goal to myself to eat healthy exercise a lot, because I was a little over average compared to all of my friends who looked like sticks (I was an early bloomer, so I've always been a little taller and had a lot more of a figure), which I look back thinking I was an idiot, now. But I did get a lot more healthy and I felt great and confident about myself.
Over the school I developed really bad eating habits. For lunch I would eat out of the vending machines with my friends because none of us could drive to go anywhere yet. I had also stopped going to the gym regularly.
Now, I feel like I'm always hungry. Even when I'm not hungry I eat and I can't stop it. And it's not healthy food, either. I've probably gained about ten pounds. I binge like crazy. I'll get in a fight with my boyfriend and eat a huge bowl of icecream to make me feel better. When I'm bored I eat even more. It's out of control. I feel like I have no control over myself anymore.
I feel fat in my clothes I wear. And my mom makes comments to me like "maybe you shouldn't eat all the time" and it just makes me feel worse (honestly, I think she was the one that got me this way).
I don't know what to do. I almost feel like I have some sort of disorder. I get out of it sometimes though... Usually once I get past the first three days of eating healthy I can usually stick to it for a week. I feel like I'm SO addicted to food! It's taken over everything.
Is this a disorder? Or do I just have a really bad eating habit?
(I'm 16, about 115 pounds, I'm 5'3" and I have a small frame)
Post edited at 9:36 pm on June 30, 2008 by crazy4you
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All you need is love, love, love is all you need.